It is interesting how our viewpoints change over the years. Most of what we know and understand comes from our household upbringing, schooling and life experiences. Everything affects our perceptions. There was a time when I said openly, “I can’t figure out why people get divorced.” “I can understand when someone is being abused (hurt/hit), that divorce is the only option, but I think divorce is just something people do when they get tired of someone instead of working things out.”
My viewpoint changed drastically once I figured out that for over 15 years, I was EMOTIONALLY and FINANCIALLY abused. How could I possibly figure it out while it was happening? We’re expected to trust the person we marry, aren’t we? What a shock to my psyche when I finally figured out what had occurred through coercion and deception.
The court system and police only consider abuse in my state when the victim is bloodied or beaten with visible signs. As many of us know, abuse has SO many invasive ways to enter our relationships. Fortunately, in the last few years, society is catching up to the concept by recognizing the adverse effects of bullying.
Now, I know what a great thing divorce is. Going through the process was terrifying when it began (most dangerous time when ending an abusive relationship) – the conclusion is the most freeing feeling ever.
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